Transcript of Episode 106 - Cohabitation Living Together
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00:00:08| living in sin in a den of iniquity tonight we're gonna talk a little bit about cohabitation so join us back open a cold one a cold one being a hard case against marriage that is so I'm Dan and
00:00:33| I'm Nick folks for old friends dissecting one topic at a time people technology media we've got it all covered each discussion here is a deep dive in or unique perspective taboo
00:00:45| forbidden subjects they're all on the chopping block baby we don't pander to popular opinion thank you get a little bit dirty morning this podcast may contain mature language and sexual
00:00:57| content and in sport entertainment purposes only so join us have a good time open up your earholes [Music] and those are real lips hmm yeah that
00:01:31| looks sexy if I mean they are real lips no that was my tongue I should toss your tongue yeah it's like Botox yeah my weirdest insert botulism in here and you live it is kind of odd isn't it cuz it
00:01:49| was weekend I guess I can't but anyway hmm interesting welcome to the pod yeah we're gonna talk about living alone and not living alone living alone habitation Co finish hoho
00:02:03| bish and I put cohabitat as my toy to have that a good one because it's active it's like a gerund mm-hmm and then we got a few any things you want to cover any specifics got like a top three yeah
00:02:18| sexual activity the new movement with Millennials now Millennials is a key word everyone loves awesome right there God right there I want to talk about the religious aspects of it maybe a little
00:02:32| bit huh mm-hmm and then lastly that's it I want to reflect on like our own aspects of cohabitation and then maybe a little financial aspect to it
00:02:43| Oh Tommy economic factors economical economical and then the annoyances of actually living with someone how it interacts with everything you do mmm how they're getting in your business mm-hmm
00:03:00| oh she is always in my business but just our record answer no no okay okay so are you only sucker I guess let's just talk about the word cohabitation sure what was the roots and the origin
00:03:19| of it do you have that I do not I'll either do I habitate integrate living together Co I'm doing it I did put in some filing cuz apparently we're live well every oh my god my mother sees even
00:03:33| I don't even live with her anymore I do not cohabitate do cohabitate if you live with your parents yeah really you live in the same household okay and we start from the
00:03:44| beginning the very beginning yeah because I also read that no I think you're not cohabitating if you live with your parents I think it's called living with your parents when you cohabitate I
00:03:53| believe the definition is you you live with someone who you are romantically or sexually active with so you don't cohabitate with your roommates from college I think there's no sexual
00:04:07| there's your origin which is a couple's version and then the state or fact of living or existing at the same time or in the same place I think we're really discussing my definition today what I
00:04:19| think I don't know I think we you touch it's different than having a roommate I don't think I mean it is different if you want to get into your intimate sexual relationships mm-hmm you do with
00:04:33| my room with my roommates really yeah has it's really so I consider it to be like thinking of all the time that I've spent living alone in my entire life it was this tiny span between graduating
00:04:51| college and moving down here which was only about nine months like really truly honestly living alone did you live with your buddy before and almost certainly did the stats on that do not favor
00:05:05| people who live cohabitate but also one thing you have to watch there's a caveat caveat these websites are all biased based on religious aspect yeah there's so many of them look a factual but there
00:05:17| you can tell why the words you can just tell I can tell by the title and where it's coming from yeah this remind me when we did the porn episode and it'll be like his porn
00:05:26| healthy and then like all the websites were like beat the Beast ironically enough sounds like they want you to do it defeat the monster slay the uh you know
00:05:38| they have all these words I guess 15 or something yeah something like it how would you do that that's incredible or weird wait wait many of us 15 oh god please do not fat fine sapa thighs or
00:05:52| when any man has an unusual bodily discharge such a discharges unclean anyone who touches his bed must wash their clothes and bathe in water and they will be unclean until evening so
00:06:04| you just got uncleanliness for a night don't don't do it don't do it won't do it morning yeah exactly a long day yeah usually I just use like a towel or something like it
00:06:15| you know yeah I make sure it doesn't touch me and then I'm I'm clean you're clean I'm good nice feed on you bro hmm well which is one thing you can't do when you cohabitate
00:06:26| if someone's always around you imagine if you lived in a an apartment that only had one room a studio apartment studio I don't know why they make it sound grand so see it has to sound like something
00:06:36| yeah that's a real estate real estate folks yeah mm-hmm so if you understand your garbage and that person always lived with you like if they were sitting in the background like you had the same
00:06:47| work hours essentially yeah you hung out with the same people how cuz your friends or whatever how would you do you would not do well I didn't do well so Tommy the flowers my old roommate I was
00:07:03| roommates with him for four years we're the only ones that shared a room by the time we lived in the house but we had like some of the same classes we always went to the same parties same
00:07:12| schedules essentially except he had crew early in the morning hmm I like 5:45 in the morning we just said what you shouldn't do in the morning guess what that's what I would do it and
00:07:26| then you're gonna crow All Right see ya all right dude oh this is that like II like click that lock do you like right back then right back to nm right back to sleep until classes you know
00:07:38| yeah beautiful glorious that is actually whenever someone would leave the house when I was a teenager whenever everyone would leave the house gods of lowered I mean once you have the house to yourself
00:08:00| you're pretty much like this is my domain and then you prove it by not being bored anymore I don't know if that's proving it but it's that it's definitely something to do expression it
00:08:11| is physical expression yeah so this is like living alone talk the opposite of cohabitation like there are pros and cons to both I guess alright I think that's I will say how
00:08:27| often have you lived alone if you ever don't know if I ever have maybe I haven't hold on roommates roommates housemates girlfriend no I think I've never lived alone it's not right hey I
00:08:45| think you just said something earlier that's weird so how long did you do it for nine months and I thought I was losing my mind at the end because I kind of fell into a routine and then
00:08:54| everything kind of like meshes together and you just start to lose your mind honestly I think I don't think I don't think I'm made for it even though I'm very introverted I don't write I don't
00:09:05| do well that's Azir I lose focus like yeah there's no social aspect in your house yeah like that's weird cuz my house is one giant social aspect yeah I paint in my a social expect a fun one a
00:09:22| laugh and I doing stuff and once you have kids it's kind of out you know what I mean yeah which is why I consider cohabitation more than just a spouse okay because your kid I can see where
00:09:32| you'd run that so we're talking about being alone versus being whatever see I did more of my research on just people who live together boyfriend girlfriend style manage then arch touch they yeah
00:09:42| well we will cuz that's where I did a lot of my research um I think just last year was the first year that they cohabitating been married huh it's the first time it's happened in I mean since
00:09:58| census since I censuses sense these have been done see cuz up did a bunch of vehicles that's good yeah but it's the first time I think it's around 30% or something like that and married is down
00:10:14| there like 28% or something like that so the cohabitation before marriage is is happening a lot more because yeah people there's no stigma even the religious right and there's also yeah the UM so
00:10:26| for reference 1968 which was roughly fifty years ago eighteen to twenty four group do you know what percentage of them cohabitated in a house together like couples that
00:10:40| weren't married 0.1% wow that's almost nobody that's those of the people that are ostracized it literally doubled in the 25 to 34 group back then though point two percent
00:10:54| Wow people were afraid to report it exactly some of its reporting but some of it I mean think about it you didn't buy a house unless you were like newlyweds or like party married or
00:11:06| something and a lot of diverse cultures lips what he's probably like under 10% or 15% back then wasn't it in the 60s I guess yeah I guess because you ostracized based on
00:11:17| the hair and it was like let me see a religion yeah yeah religion was tied to the laws a little bit kind of - I don't know yeah even though it's not like it doesn't
00:11:26| seem like it actually no it doesn't actually do it so now it's like it's on the rise well did you see the first time ever that it was uh not I don't know if it's the technically atheists but like
00:11:40| non-religious people are now overtaking all other demographic really spirituality so there's no majority now I think it's making a change you're making a push mm-hmm all this stuff EDS
00:11:52| and flows yeah like think about it you couldn't just like we would even what I'm doing like even what I did yeah like you go what Winnick what did I do I am I moved in
00:12:09| with my friend and then I heard sister moved in and then now I live with that her and we had a kid any well anyway oh I am living in sin a complicated arrangement it's a complicated
00:12:31| arrangement which I brought upon myself or didn't or still don't I don't know that it's more complicated than a non like a married situation like yeah there's totally something to be said for
00:12:47| um a lot of the websites I came across and YouTube videos and stuff where were very um conservative ones with conservative views non liberal and they were like the reason that cohabitation
00:12:59| always leads to divorce is this oh it was like it was only like 60% of like people who cohabitated before marriage actually got divorced whereas like I guess general is 50% right and the other
00:13:14| thing is to actually divorced or separated the cohabitation thing I did didn't specify but it did specify that if you were married for seven years that it's the same as everything else it
00:13:26| didn't matter right so what we're saying because we read the articles and whoever's listening might not have there tends to be a push from the conservative side that says if you cohabitate before
00:13:37| you get married hey you might not get married B you'll not respect your wife if you're a man C you will have a kid out of wedlock you will have a kid out of wedlock and then
00:13:49| you will get divorced well I mean that kind of still happens regardless of the cohabitation so what about the try before you buy an aspect so it found that people who were sexually active
00:14:03| earlier in life tend to be happy not give a [ __ ] about but not give a [ __ ] about cohabitation like it's not a big deal because they've tried it before they buy it it like is that is that the
00:14:16| sticking point habitation versus marriage is it the sex or is it like that you don't sign legal paperwork because marriages is it about legality or religious kind of themes so
00:14:27| I guess we're gonna rewind before you have kids yeah so it's just two people living together deciding that they want to be together I assume mm-hmm I mean the marriage part favors the woman most
00:14:39| of the time so the man has more power when it's just cohabitating and I guess that's why most I guess must be my room arm maybe but there's also this to keep in mind the marriage is less apt to fall
00:14:53| apart because there's ramifications legally financially and otherwise which I mean you just touched on but I'm expanding on it yeah like there's a shared bank account now that has to be
00:15:05| separated there's legal paperwork you have to file to be divorced to legally be separated it's more than just a cohabitation we hate each other we're gonna leave and then you leave and you
00:15:16| kind of argue over who gets what and it all gets thrown out the window anyway so I take it from a different aspect is it and I don't I can't imagine marrying somebody without having lived with them
00:15:25| because when you live with them you see the weirdness that they believe so lets through them yeah let's let's look at the true annoyances that we have of the other person so my friend Ryan who's a
00:15:39| big fan of the podcast he dated a girl that he met for nine months and then popped a question Wow he knew some his lightening feelings sure that's that's totally fine but my
00:15:53| argument to myself I don't think I ever told him was always you don't even know what she's like in November December and January you don't speak Italian oh yeah I mean you don't know something for a
00:16:07| full year that's weird no even the first three or four months when you meet somebody there's that puppy love that just engulfs you and that could be the shitty months that they live in their
00:16:17| cycle of liddie could be we also did the episode of limerence and love you can click it here we're here I was so you 16 I think how did you know that's incredible and
00:16:28| and anyway you can just look it up because we're not gonna have the link hmm anyway um yeah that the limerence thing and puppy love it's a it's a real thing beyond conservative argument
00:16:40| against cohabitation touched on that they said well when you cohabitate you're in puppy love and you don't really know what responsibility is so now I kept wanting to tell the video
00:16:50| also is so this has crashed four months of marriage what's dense yeah you think you're in some sort of like fantastic place that you're supposed to be in I don't know that I don't know that you
00:17:03| should follow societal norms because they don't really lead anywhere they might merely lead to a societal normal outcome usually which yeah which is neutral really yeah so it was a really
00:17:17| low guide I know you want to touch on what Sumerian things people do yeah there you go good I know it go off the toothpaste roll like the toothpaste the tube she scrunches it with her fists and
00:17:30| doesn't like yeah supposed to go from the back end forward and then like the top of it it doesn't cross field Palestine mmm-hmm how do you do that how do you do that makes you so mad I can
00:17:44| actually tell I I don't know I mean we keep separate roles but we only have to share it's like what is this is this my life now center for ants yeah do you um do you guys use the same toothpaste like
00:17:58| is there an agreement or is it different every time or typically different until she runs out and then I'm the Boy Scout so I'm always prepared so I have like an extra roll mmm so like I like share it
00:18:08| for a little while until you get annoyed and then I pull it XII folks everyone listen and Dan here is he's just so he said the door he's so good reach you right aim take this toothpaste roll and
00:18:23| shove it if it's toothpaste rule goddamn right I bought it I was proud yeah goddamn right you should prep next time we'll teach you interpret and ever you look at drill sergeant I can see you
00:18:36| showing up where's your to face take this take it now goddammit goddammit anyway mine's uh it's a lot of little things like the it all adds up okay it does it's like it's
00:18:51| like why would you let thee so there's that little carpet that sits in the middle of the bathroom oh yeah it gets kicked further and further towards the shower and when it's up against the
00:19:02| shower any water running down makes it soaking wet so I always pull it and put it towards the middle and for whatever reason one of them is always just do they kick it towards the shower I can't
00:19:11| even understand why it gets there and it's always wet and I'm always like well you don't want to touch on the tile when you step out the shower right it's this far why does it have to be put it
00:19:22| against the goddamn anyway the other one is the one Ange is done with her salad at the end of the day like she brings a saladin and then container of dressing she throws him in the sink and they
00:19:34| would sit there forever and I'm like a container like someone's plastic container a Tupperware Tupperware hey a Tupperware with a smaller cup already oh yeah the smelliest thing is salad
00:19:44| dressing and almost done salad that's been singing a container all day and every time I do it I just get a whiff of salad dressing I'm like and the other one you know what she does she is a very
00:19:57| clean individual and she will put her dishes in the sink when she's done except that she always puts her paper towel like her napkin paper towel like that she was eating dinner with in the
00:20:08| sink with it so that if an hour goes by I go back and like blues of wet paper towel and like what you've walked past the trashcan trashcan why did you bring it to the sink now I got a wet paper
00:20:19| towel a bleb paper towels like the grossest thing so let's jump let's jump out of context here because in college I lived with five or six guys at the same time in the sink is something Dory your
00:20:33| bio six guys at the same time all together all at once just you wait so I was - wait is what that was the other name mother you're good so I guess at that time we were
00:20:48| seniors and anyone I think it's at 2100 def want to tell my other 2020 dovish and I can't remember so I think we had already realized that it like doing dishes like
00:21:00| who's like out of the question so like whatever you know it's never gonna open barely if they're gonna work out yo someone's always gonna make a mess and you're gonna be like what's your problem
00:21:09| so like yeah you would never make meals because meals required that like you share the duty of doing something so like one person cooks and the other person cleans well if you have five
00:21:20| people there's always like three or four freeloaders you do your self wants reloading and that person isn't so there was never like like quote-unquote family meals in college like it's very very
00:21:33| rare that someone would like cook a meal and be like everyone eat it once and yeah everyone clean up and it's all said and done no that doesn't happen no so I guess that brings I like the
00:21:45| whole point no no that's like a dishes it's like dishes and shared stuff like washing and cleaning it's like all that stuff is kind of like contentious so that you're only battling but the door
00:21:57| is taking the police and Counting how much work you're doing yeah hundred percent cuz I do more dishes than anyone at this point it's slowly becoming more and more and
00:22:10| every time I do that I'm like keep in mind like I'm just keeping track and then someone when you're almost done will pop in and say do you need any help no no just did mall good we're good
00:22:22| I'm keeping track I always love the like I cooked a meal like two days ago and I'm like you get down the bottom of the sink and it's like what what is this still doing here this should have been
00:22:31| done a day ago you're just like what hunts from two days ago : Oh I guess I'll just I guess I'll just do it now bitter so cohabitation equals bitterness keeping score mm-hmm well
00:22:51| here's the question so I'll ask you since you have lived too long I can't figure out the delineation of work and how to do it if you lived alone following all the tests that I had to do
00:23:02| when I live to live how did I do them essentially or like how much work was it actually it's weird yeah as you is it a lot I've no idea laundry trash I'm where did my systems
00:23:13| because like I'll do it in such a way that I will do the least amount of work possible like when I I'll do this like when I do my laundry like I'll have two drawers
00:23:22| open like underwear and socks and like those things are easy to toss so like as I'm doing my laundry I'm just like throwing like stuff that's not socks or underwear
00:23:31| aside and then every soccer underwear I like throw it in the drawers throwing it it's like a five-minute process of like doing my laundry and then like I take the pile and I I do that it takes me no
00:23:42| time at all I feel like when I do it by myself like I'm already preparing for my future self to do it so I make it such that it's easy to yea make sense but like your trashcan will get filled
00:23:54| eventually or like do you do dishes from what you just made at night and then like you clean it like immediately cuz I knew I had to go oh that makes sense because it's no there's no hope there
00:24:06| that someone else is gonna take care of it yeah yeah there's no no one is gonna yeah let's do whatever needs to be done like you much if somebody showed up knock knock I'm sorry walking through
00:24:16| fishes and you're like okay let's see what imagine if it was like a really hot sexy woman that just like was like I want to do your dishes like you'd be like what and then my dishes afterwards
00:24:28| you're just like does how does this end like hmm you want to take care of my dog my dog needs to be walked yeah how much do you charge for dog walking should rub and tugs be legal folks that was the
00:24:52| owner of the Patriots is that where you're going no no I just I was because he was calling supper and I robbed begin at rhodium yes he was the guy with millions of dollars gets caught in like
00:25:03| a like a strip mall Roberto Diaz - I guess I don't know I mean I would have a private rub-and-tug er but isn't it but worrying after a while it's the same person doing the same move
00:25:16| okay you're gonna be surprised good the backroom song will come in like wow the wind someone who's not good at this yeah I mean I want to feel like a
00:25:31| teenager again it's like hey there's the whole argument like you know if they're really good at their job you're done in like a minute you don't I mean but if someone's not
00:25:40| good at their job you get your money's worth it's like I want someone who's okay time though oh god oh face yeah that's the funniest scene in the movie because I still don't know what's going
00:25:58| on in this little interaction between his yeah I do the ways you say I get the partying blow me like that that's so good oh so what I will say Rick with the cohabitation though the positives are
00:26:20| like I look at going back to college and living with a bunch of guys is that there's always I'm gonna hang out with there's always something to do if you want to go get a meal there's somebody
00:26:31| don't have to do a lot of work either true I know I mean you do but you know one does it so it's kind of cool it's like you're not doing dishes a lot but that's because no one's doing dishes a
00:26:42| lot and there's no like the middle ground is like like maybe someone does that maybe someone doesn't but if there's like a hard ground we're like he had a huge party and like the apartment
00:26:51| is trashed everyone helps out like they all get it see that that that everyone's going to work on yeah so it's there's there's positives there that like you know
00:27:02| everyone has a limit and they all know when to chip in mm-hmm I miss Lisa you end up bonding with those people so much so deeply you miss also because of the time of your life and where you are in
00:27:16| your life and possibilities uh yeah sure shatter what was that word Hey Oh with something I touched on if we wanted to switch it and talk about college days forever oh yes which it I
00:27:33| know I know all right so with cohabitation that people people were sexually active earlier tend to be like who gives a [ __ ] yeah live together like it go ahead
00:27:44| because people there's a some religious conservative type idea that you should save sex and living with someone for marriage mm-hmm but you had said it earlier like if you don't know a person
00:27:57| that way then you don't know them right that's true I read the staff that only like twenty seven percent of people will actually disapprove of cohabitating before
00:28:06| marriage she's been there do you know what Mays group I'm gets over fifty it's probably older people yeah yeah yeah I saw a stat it was like 18 and 25 26 to was like the most disapproving there's
00:28:24| no there's a computer yeah they just said elders didn't even have an age group do you think the elders just always disapprove I feel like maybe that's the role in society they're going
00:28:34| to but think of this like if we hear that like 16 year olds around sex with like 38 year olds in like 15 20 years or what's not 18 8 like 16 years having sex with 38 year olds so like sugar daddies
00:28:49| no like sixteen year olds are having sex with 38 year olds it's cute murder your keywords keywords but I mean if we heard that and people are like so sorry are you saying just let it go at this point
00:29:07| don't that at that point I feel like the woman is being taken advantage of because I don't think that's so but so is an 18 year old that make sex with a thirty million year old do you don't
00:29:17| even what's the difference and we're not gonna do a wipe is against a sexist view yeah cuz I assume that it's a guy going after a younger girl but it would be another guy after an older woman and
00:29:27| again this is like 30 years which maybe it'll be almost passe and I'll be like this mm-hmm I'll make this face too this does kind of go into like the
00:29:39| your scandals of like the older teachers having sex with the younger guys that's a phenomenon I don't know what that is well they're they're I think they're being tried but not severely like
00:29:49| they're just like socially it's almost excited to get the sex crime well socially they're getting high fives or whatever or like it's like not legally I think they're getting pretty big trouble
00:30:00| we should do an episode on reassure someone I follow always posts the best stories they can and then the picture of the teacher and it's like usually a white woman in there like 30s it was
00:30:12| like not bad-looking yeah it's really weird it's like it doesn't make sense why she couldn't just go after someone her own age I don't know it's there might like a little bit
00:30:22| eager student relationship or something he's like I don't know she's teaching them and they're learning from her because her husband never listens to her and doesn't learn from her so she's
00:30:30| actually able to touch someone even if it's technically intellectual now she's like it's weird because I never look at a picture of a guy who had committed the same crime and say oh he's am i
00:30:43| attractive and like I understand finds elsewhere cohabitation hmm cohabit mm-hmm I think we covered all the citiots actually you and do learning every kind of time so the size of a
00:31:07| household what's that so back in 1960s the size of a house was like 3.3 people perhaps up now it's only like 2.5 so like people having less kids yeah that's part of a special s that are
00:31:22| actually between people not like only children do you think only children because they're alone they're more likely to be alone I didn't look up stack the only children I don't know no
00:31:35| because I feel like they get married now they're probably less likely as in bids are more to get married that dirty word we haven't even gotten into marriage really I like a smaller
00:31:48| household I don't know I think that we have no she didn't like a how larger household is more loving and more friendly and full house little style there's you I mean you were just talking
00:31:58| about having living with six guys right yeah and there's a lot of love there but it's because there's more people there's more instances there's more interaction and when you only have three people in a
00:32:11| house there's less interaction by proxy maybe uh uh maybe there's fewer dynamics I mean member X&Y hate each other I mean they they don't really hate each other and Z is always prodding a fight between
00:32:26| them but Z is really like BFF with F sometimes and then sometimes a it's always like the funny guy he's like hilarious but he hates X so it's really funny when x and y are fighting with a
00:32:38| and it's like uh and Z's gonna push them and then somebody's like oh my god he brought booze and it's like you hold these different mixtures going on and like pushes and pulls and relationships
00:32:48| so the more people the more of that going on more dynamics if I were to say yes fewer people fewer dynamics fewer interesting interactions right yeah what's happening unless you can you
00:33:02| can't pick and choose as much you're forced to so if it's only two people you're forced to deal with whatever they think especially if you're in a relationship or you're married is you're
00:33:11| forced to deal with whatever [ __ ] they shovel your way even if the [ __ ] becomes a big pile of crap that have to pull twice your way yeah right there's no other people that delineate it or break
00:33:23| it up and don't judge it yeah it's shoving them one day the other day one guy the other day and like break it off you're kind of it's a very heavy load do you feel like you have a media tour
00:33:31| though do you think we're like third party your third party jumps in and says this isn't how would you be sometimes but only it changes anything hmm interesting because no for a very easy
00:33:47| reason when it's three guys living together as roommates you all have equal say yeah equal power weights when it's two people in a very serious relationship with a kid
00:33:56| and then just a third party they're almost treated as a third party sometimes like when things get serious yes what's what stay do you have missed yeah exactly exactly I'm fourth wheel
00:34:09| that makes what we call a vehicle regularise oh [ __ ] where's earlier I had somewhere to go and it was good I forget what it was shoveling [ __ ] is that we were thinking up oh [ __ ] me yeah
00:34:30| so do you think what's the different swing cohabitation in marriage ultimately is it just a piece of paper or is there something else to it so ah this is where I was gonna go
00:34:43| economically there so like there was a period where like financially people relied on each other so like and there's an instance like maybe you are relying on someone for financial backing in
00:34:54| order to live where you live yeah it's like I would such in my relationship its flipped or it was flipped in the beginning at least then to live where we live it required me to make more money
00:35:05| than what money yeah right so in a lot of cases I think women or upselling there's that stat for like female doctors like female doctors will not like they won't marry a male nurses many
00:35:19| a time they will marry a male doctor yeah though or higher they'll go for somebody that has a higher income than they do but very rarely they'll go down but a male doctor will go down pretty
00:35:31| readily he'll go down he'll come to town like July he's going on some hot dogs he's bobbing down some dogs baby yeah so like that economically I feel like back then it was required like the 1960s you
00:35:48| always have all that the tropes about how like a man was the person making yeah right winner and it was very difficult for a woman to like seek her own income and become independent like
00:36:00| you didn't have I feel like 1970s 80s that kind of started that and then now it's kind of like a little repetition now it's like it's getting pretty close yeah like it's not a surprise to find a
00:36:11| woman that makes more than a man yeah [ __ ] who lives with her and more that ain't fighting with her every night or that ghoul on like Google got cited for like being sexist and then when they
00:36:23| actually looked the data it turned out that they were underpaying men and the same roles as women and they're like oh weird interesting yeah I guess it's a general consensus of view of viewpoint
00:36:36| more an image than it is a fact yeah there's no I don't know that there's any way to prove how much people should make so no of course not so not just economic roles but um like cleaning roles and we
00:36:52| touched on this but they said the difference between cohabitation and marriage is that when you cohabitate this is the argument by like what's his name he's a nerd ben shapiro
00:37:02| you know is oh yeah he's very good at debate life foot by foot for though I don't know Ben Shapiro's height offhand I feel like he is and I feel like I feel like he's never as I've said in me wrong
00:37:15| he talks really fast people who talk too fast I don't trust them no I don't trust me anyway um I think his argument against cohabitation and marriage was that um crap I should
00:37:28| start about economic Oh like when you cohabitate you're having a good time you're laughing you're having drinks you're going out and partying when you get married all of that has to change
00:37:38| and there are roles that are assumed and that people aren't ready for those roles and it it's rocks them and it's the problem with cohabitating first is that you're
00:37:48| you have this expectation of fun and good times and everything but marriage is hard so just seem like you're sleeping over the unless you got you have a big point
00:38:00| to make no it wasn't a big point guys what am I skip you're skipping over the point where you're supposed to be like at the alpha you're supposed to go out and like hope and track down your women
00:38:10| and like yeah make the money you're supposed to do things that are like power actually got hurt by hitting her over a head with a wooden cool like really I hit her over the head
00:38:19| grabbed her hair and just dragged or dad joke I've ever heard one the crap little caveman jokes yeah so there's there's a period of your life where you're supposed to be like free-ranging lone
00:38:31| wolf whatever like you're supposed to like discover your own make your own would you ever do that no not really yeah I don't the way you broke up I was like I'm waiting for you to kind of say
00:38:41| I did it now I could see I could see a lot of my friends like think that do it but then there was no like comeuppance there's no there's no like glory moment where they're like I did it like I don't
00:38:55| think the glory is actually there I think the glory is in the long run finding someone that's like compatible just letting it anywhere listen there's no glory there's no galore it's all dead
00:39:04| so if you had made if you're making like double what you're making now or triple sure what do you think did would that change would you be like I'm gonna buy a house I'm gonna make sure you live in it
00:39:15| and then like it would you have the power yeah but then no people I would have the power but then the arguments would still be there that the Paper Towns will still
00:39:26| be in the sink the yeah a lot of the same stuff would show up yeah it wouldn't change it changes the dynamics in that where you're doing the argument whoa what house you're doing it in how
00:39:41| much money you're arguing over but it's like still it's okay no a lot basically the same regardless of their environment that's what you're trying to sin regardless of whether they're married or
00:39:51| regardless whether they're cohabitating and regardless of how much money they actually make they tend to out spend their means they tend to do certain things to each other
00:40:02| piss each other off in a weird way if you could have somebody that takes care of all those things do you think there's less love and the relationship if do you think that's like less of a relationship
00:40:14| if you have someone taking care of all the arguments like if there's a maid that would clean you're saying can do your laundry and remove those no because then what's left
00:40:28| what do you argue over I don't know not even just argue over what colors you're painting like like there's no there's nothing going on so there's more blank spaces so this is the the housewife
00:40:43| which we do we don't have single I don't would you call it housewives I guess moms to stay home with her kids right oh right how many we do word we don't have them I assume if
00:40:58| we had a lot of money that our women B could become house makers homemakers probably and stay home and just do them the clean the house ya know did your mom stay home for a while but then she had
00:41:13| her job okay and that was Barca but yeah yeah my mom stayed home until I guess it shouldn't have to take care of us so then she became a homemaker late grade school or something yeah so it's
00:41:26| kind of a they start to make it make it a home they start to add knickknacks and crap all over the place and then like things are you there all the time yeah I guess if you have a lot of time on your
00:41:38| hands you start to make you know why did you literally said it earlier when you said you lived alone for nine months it your father she probably starts to drive them crazy
00:41:47| they're probably like mm-hmm and that's you have to get out you have to interact you have to see something different you have to get out there I don't know hmm hmm where were my points what was I
00:42:02| gonna hit on in the beginning I forget already you were really big on the viagra [Laughter] surprise that Ted Cruz is 511 they make
00:42:20| him look short in a lot of pictures wait Ted Cruz the guy who looks like the uncle from The Munsters yeah grandpa grandpa excuse me oh man mmm so here's my question I did
00:42:41| touch on it you didn't answer it what is the damn difference between being married and cohabitating I see because I'm married with money did getting married okay I wasn't against
00:42:53| marriage like some people are against it or whatever it's mine based a little bit on finances a little bit on me it's only like if lawyers get involved like I've already get divorced it would cost money
00:43:05| to have a lawyer involved and then she makes somewhere - what I make so that's alimony is probably not an issue but for some people probably is and then I guess if you have kids the child support is
00:43:18| there regardless of whether you're married or not sometimes most of the time probably right there's I just read an article on the laws about that and all that stuff so I mean other than like
00:43:29| having a ring and being like take this ring and shove it every now and then like I guess there's the I guess if you don't marry a woman that she's gonna feel like she's not gonna have children
00:43:42| so which is that like the bigger issue for some women really want children and like their time frame for having children is like 35 or younger based on a French study from like the 1800s
00:43:53| so it's true it's true no I know the study we did it one on babies and not the age and all that yeah but what about people who cohabitate and do have babies does that make their relationship more
00:44:10| fragile or less enjoyable or I don't see how it changes things at all really unless you its unless one of them wants to get married do you think she wants to get married she makes more than you
00:44:25| should be that's like sharing finances is part of getting married a little bit you have common common finances do you have come and finances yes no we do no no you write a check could say this is
00:44:37| how much I owe and then she grunts this is so bitter mm-hmm all right so like age of getting married has that shifted to oh it's going up they know food readily yeah
00:44:56| in the 1500 so good oh yeah since you live longer did you know that I think Nebraska their legal age of getting married is 19 instead of 18 which is like every other state except for
00:45:11| Mississippi which is like you have to be not anything no no actually you have to be 21 or wait I think you have to be yeah 20 or 21 Oh what's going on there I have no idea but it it's bizarre
00:45:25| now Mississippi 21 I didn't write that tap that's weird I don't know why I don't I mean good on them in a way should be you should be older Daffy to marry cohabitation should actually be a
00:45:36| law I just changed my mind right now haha proof I mean I'm just thinking about it cuz think about it when time when I was 20 or 21 no friggin know so that's like mentally I think your
00:45:48| personality fuses they're 25 26 ish somewhere in there and now in I think the study ran until 2017 so the women were getting married at twenty seven point four and men were
00:46:02| getting married at twenty nine point five so say yeah so this is perfect spawned a big response call response there's a whole there's a whole segment of this show we could have talked about
00:46:21| yeah LGBTQ they did yeah I think so I think there's another one actually that's like steamed or slicing so no that's favourite include beans include the arts and arts no no I was just gonna
00:46:37| say they have to cohabitate in a lot of states now it's changed in recent years but like that's if you were gay or lesbian or something and you wanted to be married they wouldn't let you so you
00:46:48| had to cohabitate so the insurance is another aspect of this which we didn't talk about it's like if you want a partner ship someone's gone partnership with PAA
00:46:57| yes yes that you have to prove that you're like connected in some way and if you share a small matter what's common-law marriage is at five years or something it really depends on where you
00:47:08| are it's like a year or something maybe two years in Texas yeah I thought I was like three or five years here but maybe although it's the girl every state they I think they do it down here because of
00:47:20| immigrants and if the immigrants live together long enough it's like you guys are married and that'll be like ass behind ya and I'd be like no you guys are married you're like you're like
00:47:31| married there was a there thing right there will we miss it like the insurance part of it is key to is if you have a kid and it's not your kid but you have better insurance then you have to prove
00:47:43| that it's like buy a partner it becomes difficult like these things should not be intertwined and for some reason they are they shouldn't be but then there's like our cases are pretty cut-and-dry
00:47:54| like there are people who have kids with people then move away and then start dating their sister and their cousin and then like do this and they go back and they're like well I still care for the
00:48:04| kid and it's like that's still my kid and she's like you can care for the kid that's my kid and they're like yeah I'll do it but what's his legal recourse here and they're like well he's gonna pay for
00:48:15| the insurance I'll clean them and then he does this and it's it's it's kind of a mess and I think that's what people are against they don't want a mess because the kids could get lost in the
00:48:26| cracks like with marriage there's a there's a one and there's another and they have to stay together and they they both have the kid at heart when you don't I guess people are afraid that
00:48:37| you're going to have all these other connections all these other partners all these other kids and they people get lost it's kind of the argument against it I guess there's a quote from the
00:48:49| movie adaptation all I really love is that she says this one I think this was a screenplay and what his name playing no news media plays II please both characters are River in itself but I
00:49:03| think Meryl Streep says it like people like to whittle down life to the simple pieces so that it makes more sense because it's easier to handle so like whittling the act of whittling
00:49:14| it down is like making it so you get married and you have one person and not like it's not like you have this web of people that are your love interests like that's a weird thing that's a weird
00:49:24| concept to be polyamorous like to have multiple wives or multiple houses or like mistresses change every seven years don't don't people change things change even if even if you don't society
00:49:39| changes in a way that things change so we live longer you get more related to resent each other you can grow apart you can go in different directions this is all real stuff so I don't know if I
00:49:56| want to ask this question I might not answer hey I can ask it it's like have you found that you wanted I mean I I feel like it there there are certain women that I see and I interact with
00:50:08| that I'd be like it'd be really interesting to like have dated them like if they had met me when I was younger I wish I could have met like had been like let's try this out go back in time when
00:50:18| you were that you'd the age you met them at and they were that age because they might be different now but good yeah I feel like there's a period where you realize like 95% of the person that
00:50:29| you're with and you know their limitations and there's a randomness to like you know they're going he you know they're this you know what they're gonna say when you bring up this and this is
00:50:40| the counter-argument I think already is that the other person is really lowering and interesting and different until you really get down to it and I feel like it's exactly these two cohabitated with
00:50:50| them you'd be in the exact same situation yeah they would still eventually get banished yeah yeah yeah they would they would do the the toothpaste or wrong way yeah which way
00:51:00| is the toilet paper supposed to go it depends if you have kids that are cats that hit it you reverse it if they have kids so they don't unroll the whole thing under over we shouldn't say to me
00:51:16| roll it out towards the back think you know a guy yeah sorry no guys sorry Nick what about not replacing the toilet paper at all and just leaving an empty
00:51:30| roll and then picking it up and rolling it over though you're gonna hate me for this and maybe they would have this complain about me no no no no if I use toilet paper I take the roll off the
00:51:42| stupid-ass spindle wrapped around my hand I use it wrap around my hand use it and then sometimes I forget to put it back on the spindle because I I'm not spindling know that you're not a
00:51:51| Spindler no I have to grab it with my hand just do this a guy who doesn't wash his towels this is not Spindler that's correct if you I live together I'm probably be pissed off at each other
00:52:05| about this is what it comes down to really this is really weird I'm Debbie we would hate each other but I don't know what for well I think I I figured there'd be a smell like I remember you
00:52:15| like using your shower at your your parents place and like there's a little mold on the on the like that not the sheet like the plastic curtain and I was like I see you [ __ ] live like this
00:52:28| and like I would leave it till it gets just covered in mold I care less that's it boy I like touching that slimy surface it's just like but anyway that is a my girlfriend sister she cleans he
00:52:44| changes it all the time like it that's what work boils down to in these households these cohabitation cease marriage is anything it's the lowest common denominator there's
00:52:55| someone who will break and fix it I'm gonna McLean Rick and did or do whatever right yeah oh yeah and sometimes you know when you're being tested it's like I'm gonna leave this for that person so
00:53:09| that they do it or not and we're gonna let's find out they don't of interest Tommy the flowers he and I were than the best two people at pushing an envelope as far
00:53:25| as humanly possible hmm we would have garbage sit in the room both of us thought the others haha and leave it for months I can leave a piece of trash with ketchup in it and
00:53:37| a paper towel for over six weeks and he could leave it like we would have these contests that who were aware of the weren't aware of and we would just push it to some weird limit that I didn't
00:53:52| think was humanly possible he was really good at it I was I became really good at it because he was good at it his alarm would go off for 45 minutes straight one day and I just refused to
00:54:05| tell him his alarm was going off so I tried to ignore it like cohabitation teaches you a lot about a person and to this day I don't think I hate anyone as much as I hate him I love them
00:54:18| well your mental resilience went up yo he went up through the roof so you're gonna touch on kids sure so I'm not going to touch any kids touch on them like that yeah just know about them so I
00:54:38| have to and it's I don't it's difficult because you wake up I realized today I wake up I take care of them I go to work I get back I might have half an hour Picon for daycare and then take care of
00:54:55| them again until I do this podcast so I'd like the entire day is mostly dealing with shitty diapers and then dealing with the Supremes and cleaning up the things that people won't clean up
00:55:09| themselves yeah it's really picking up stuff the other people were playing with exactly so there was like a resilience there that I don't know you realize is there I thought it I thought about this
00:55:21| today is that when if I were to go back in time and to be a kid again I would be like um like I have all this free time I could just go out and like play in the forest or do some weird [ __ ] like
00:55:32| whatever the hell I wanted to do it's like as you get older you don't have any of that and people are all like they start piling up on top of you and they start relying on you and then you become
00:55:43| like the like breadwinner but like the head of the household so like you're relied upon which makes it so you can't do very much at all I put it this way um you become
00:55:55| as you grow you become like a tree I mean you have roots you can't you couldn't pick up and leave tomorrow could you give so many financial connections so many work things so many
00:56:06| people so many things that rely on you to leave children so many connections sociological just regular stuff like if you left for a week and your lawn over grill you'd have to have a cut because
00:56:19| ordinances say you will be fine then you're like who goes there and it's like homeowners associations these these connections responsibilities people around you jobs
00:56:32| social events even things you've committed two weeks ago like going to a party or bringing dip like it sounds stupid but they're all roots and you have so many routes that take up so much
00:56:43| of your time that you can't just go wandering off to some Island say yet don't wanna know so that leads into like restarting like if you were to restart like actually
00:56:56| forming the bonds that you have now because you've stayed in the same place family a time when a new family in a new place yeah yeah I don't think you would find that I don't know I read an article
00:57:07| about hood older people merrily and like trying to find out what they wanted to do see that's it that's too far at that age I think you're done you're over you've passed it no no no I don't think
00:57:20| I have you know why mm-hmm that's lost more weight I look good I work out if I could come into some money in a steady job I actually could probably do the whole thing again like
00:57:35| and start over I mean I don't know what happens to my past and I don't think I would do it but physically I could so there was this person I knew one of my mom's friends husbands that his kids
00:57:50| were grown and out of college and like they guess they were like 25 or again he restarted he just disappeared one day he'll was he he must have been like 55 97 and he see that
00:58:02| takes guts Dysart yet kids again I don't know what they he just kind of he restarted his life like it's weird I mean it's possible for a guy to do that all over again but leaving all that
00:58:13| behind is just bizarre get this one my um my friend who I'd mentioned earlier in the podcast his white father had two or three families and he would go away on business a ke
00:58:32| live with the other family who had their own house zone wife their own kids and and tell them after three or four days he was going away on business fifty-fifty that's insane yeah I'll burn
00:58:51| out on one family can you imagine doing that you would have so much for somebody require you double the requirements of like the family time you have to love family time which is so bizarre because
00:59:00| you have two families you just destroyed family time for both families you've destroyed both families in a way but wait I think he did it really 10 15 years before he got caught that since
00:59:12| that I can't believe that you would say yeah that leads into like Italian mistresses like I think after a World War two there weren't that many Italian guys so
00:59:22| like a mistress was like commonplace so like having like a secondary wife wasn't like a normal thing and like families were so intertwined that like Italian men will also like live with their
00:59:35| parents for a long long time that's the thing what are they called mama's boys in Italian I thought they were chocolate I don't know I wonder what the term actually is now
00:59:45| Oh mommy is Mario Luigi he imagined it how embarrassing of the if Mario or Luigi had a cloth toilet didn't know what to do I can't make the noise don't like their
01:00:07| help go down the pipe [ __ ] dude in that game is weird when you think about what the pipes and everything was a plumber well but do you think it was the pipes first and they were like let's make him
01:00:27| a plumber and they were like that'll solve every question or you think was a plumber first and they were originally teleporters or like let's just make them pipes cuz he's a plumber that's like a
01:00:38| chain or the other way around yeah that's I think they were pipes first because they were easier to design and then afterwards are like why are all these pipes here it's crazy like a
01:00:48| Japanese guy thinks of like a plumber like it doesn't seem right well why I'm telling you the pipes had to be first all the other stuff and they were just like let's make him a plumber because
01:00:59| they figured it would just solve all their problems or questions or weird things anyways I don't momma's boys' called no it's just this mama's boy well the same thing happens in like the
01:01:09| Chinese family like Chinese families if they want to marry off like a daughter like the daughter requires them to like buy a house why they the elders calories they'll get dowry it sort of is like a
01:01:20| dowry oh yeah that's a dowry ransom baby we got you cold [ __ ] Rebs up I see you I don't know how I would deal with that cuz it I mean that does force you to set
01:01:33| up like a physical location and then if they want to move into your house like whole family cuz if most Asian families do like live together like you have a grandmom like I can't imagine having
01:01:45| like parents or grandparents in the same house like it might be nice for having like caretakers for your kids but other than that how would you feel if like a father-in-law mother my mom is getting
01:02:01| on my nerves yeah he wouldn't be able to keep it up step to me she better replace that toilet paper roll if one of them is definitely not emptying the toothpaste
01:02:12| properly I can guarantee I don't do it I don't think I want to deal with that so coming full circle huh what do we learned today about married people they hate each other just as much
01:02:31| as the people who are married like keep looking because you're never gonna find it this is a weird question our people meant to live together I would think so like I would say yeah
01:02:46| yeah well history dictates that like you live in villages they protect you like living in a and a like apartment complex or a neighborhood but you could actually live in individual huts next to each
01:02:58| other in a village are people supposed to live in one hut if like share things I feel like there's moments where you like are sick like oh he's just staying at his Hut today like
01:03:12| sometimes you need that person to be like oh he needs something like you need so so this is part that we didn't touch on it's like we touched on insurance but like if you're saying oh we can take
01:03:23| care of you or if you just need something or like say you break a leg or something like there's someone there to notice that you're injured which also feeds into like when you get older like
01:03:38| living alone when you get older it's dangerous yeah because you could fall and break a hip and then you can't hit your first alert bracelet which is good at reversal or calm on panders our
01:03:55| sponsor slash on panners keyword a lot of the old people listening I'm gonna dice slow soon that's the key word what they were saying I was like that's not a good idea time if you got dark
01:04:12| it did get dark you know I will say this I was at work and it was late and it's late the day and I was tired I wasn't thinking and somebody was doing something like I had this like setup
01:04:26| that could hurt somebody and somebody was like fake playing with it and I said like like in my mind I was like you get hurt doing that but like it's okay because you know the risks like this is
01:04:40| the full thought but what I did say was I can't wait for you to die I don't know cuz I was laughing so hard on the inside that I was like blocking everyone else out but I was like [ __ ] like I I wasn't
01:05:01| you're not supposed to say that at work but I said that like verbatim I was like so it was kind of like that joke can't wait for you to die but I'm panderers Calm First Alert calm check it out but
01:05:16| honestly if you have someone else living with you there's security there there's Chris a sanity and there's a protection and protection if you if I was so flip it a little bit if I was a single parent
01:05:27| I would probably worried that like my kids wit might not be taken care of if I was completely alone I think that I would fear that actually like if I was incapacitated in some way my kids
01:05:37| wouldn't know what the hell to do like run to a neighbor like if I didn't have neighbors weird I actually have a weird it's not a fantasy it's like a thought practice where what if everyone
01:05:49| aged 30 and older like froze one day and couldn't move but they were okay I think how many other people would die like what all the five year olds died with all the one year olds died and like I'm
01:06:01| like it I get all nervous and I'm like oh my god what it's like okay so what if your kid was like he wasn't a script or toulon two-year-old and like now you're all frozen and you can't move would they
01:06:14| all go towards the steps which ones would die with my kid die like this like that's what I think of when I'm bored thinking I don't know yeah I don't what if everyone froze except for the babies
01:06:24| or something this is like I'm just like it just depends if the pantry is open for one other kid no that's that's what I'm saying like it really would like what would it
01:06:33| what would like a three or a five-year-old do if everyone disappeared for ten hours like what they die where they wander around the streets I have no idea you just know be fun it would be
01:06:51| funny to be like okay now you just leave your kids alone for ten hours and we'll pay you we'll pay you to see with the outcome iced it sounds like the microwave
01:06:59| microwave your baby for two seconds from $10,000 no no that baby come on baby baby it's my art because they're yes a called they're uh they're two and a half year old who can wall and behind us okay
01:07:19| baby okay baby baby baby I got real annoying after like 10 minutes or like oh you good come on baby come on baby make a platform and corner baby you know like just call her name I still know her
01:07:30| name it hasn't been your probably five hours maybe the baby's name was baby I'm feeling it had a name holy [ __ ] are they that many people named baby that's gotta be weird when you're like 83 yeah baby
01:07:45| baby it's like you couldn't find the amount of people over age 60 names baby hey well let's sum up today you know I don't know what we covered but it was fantastic wasn't it hmm all those things
01:08:15| about cohabitating and living alone and independence and privacy and how you form your own personality by the way all the web side against cohabitation yeah they were like it's gonna lead to sin
01:08:28| it's gonna lead to Jesus Makana it's gonna lead to where it wasn't one of them infidelity oh you know the things maybe I don't know today's society today
01:08:44| society go all and all that stuff and copy them that's long today society and everyone else that it does with cohabitation risk marriage I guess marriage makes it harder because
01:08:56| marriage because they're supposed to move forward I guess cuz marriage is more planned marriage takes longer marriage has more paperwork so chances are it's harder to
01:09:08| break not I'm not much harder but like you planned it you wrote it down you had dates for it cohabitation is more like we're doing the same thing without that stuff so it's more planned it's more
01:09:22| formulaic it's more structured so it makes sense that it would be better in some ways but whittle down life to its simplest but really when you whittle down life to its simplest it's the same
01:09:35| as cohabitation yeah I don't know that you feel any different because you have a ring or a piece of paper you do I don't think I've done both well I am the master of my domain mm-hmm even though
01:09:54| I'm never alone anymore except right now which I share with you cohabitating at the moment is this I guess we are if you wanted if you want to jack off okay I mean listen you wanna guess you won't
01:10:08| wear our previous guests enjoy that phase look like I don't I think we're good I think we touched on everything touch the kids did we judge the kids yeah we touched on kids we touch kids
01:10:30| you key word FBI cohabitation holy [ __ ] we touched on marriage we touched on people we touched on individuals touched on religion we touched on sanctity and this excited on
01:10:43| one is sip ye we talked about how those dryer sheets shoes moving your on trash to a toilet paper yeah this stuff that other people don't take care of and you're like what the hell why is this
01:10:59| happening every time you realize there's something you don't even know about that she was a lot about you why would he do this and you're like I do what like you don't even know that's the craziest part
01:11:11| so really people are meant to hate each other they're not meant to love each other and that's why we love you make a culture together hmm passing like an end in a petri dish or
01:11:28| in a paper towel or a towel anyway a back to folks car forward 97 hurtin escort Ford Escort a red one Brad used to drive folks thanks for joining us Sonia we think you learned a lot we
01:11:52| think we learned a lot we think the shades on sale or Tamra changed it went warm and went dark it went warm it went dark for a couple times did it really yeah yes had bit more do
01:12:03| you got me beat yeah don't I look more lean but here's this bigger my Fleener I can't tell you maybe bigger damn get pick up two kids at a time yeah this is the phase where I get jacked where I put
01:12:26| up a little barrier so they can't get in certain rooms but I have to lift my kids to people like oh let's go habitate [Laughter] thanks for tuning in folks we like you
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00:00:33| I'm Nick folks for old friends dissecting one topic at a time people technology media we've got it all covered each discussion here is a deep dive in or unique perspective taboo
00:00:45| forbidden subjects they're all on the chopping block baby we don't pander to popular opinion thank you get a little bit dirty morning this podcast may contain mature language and sexual
00:00:57| content and in sport entertainment purposes only so join us have a good time open up your earholes [Music] and those are real lips hmm yeah that
00:01:31| looks sexy if I mean they are real lips no that was my tongue I should toss your tongue yeah it's like Botox yeah my weirdest insert botulism in here and you live it is kind of odd isn't it cuz it
00:01:49| was weekend I guess I can't but anyway hmm interesting welcome to the pod yeah we're gonna talk about living alone and not living alone living alone habitation Co finish hoho
00:02:03| bish and I put cohabitat as my toy to have that a good one because it's active it's like a gerund mm-hmm and then we got a few any things you want to cover any specifics got like a top three yeah
00:02:18| sexual activity the new movement with Millennials now Millennials is a key word everyone loves awesome right there God right there I want to talk about the religious aspects of it maybe a little
00:02:32| bit huh mm-hmm and then lastly that's it I want to reflect on like our own aspects of cohabitation and then maybe a little financial aspect to it
00:02:43| Oh Tommy economic factors economical economical and then the annoyances of actually living with someone how it interacts with everything you do mmm how they're getting in your business mm-hmm
00:03:00| oh she is always in my business but just our record answer no no okay okay so are you only sucker I guess let's just talk about the word cohabitation sure what was the roots and the origin
00:03:19| of it do you have that I do not I'll either do I habitate integrate living together Co I'm doing it I did put in some filing cuz apparently we're live well every oh my god my mother sees even
00:03:33| I don't even live with her anymore I do not cohabitate do cohabitate if you live with your parents yeah really you live in the same household okay and we start from the
00:03:44| beginning the very beginning yeah because I also read that no I think you're not cohabitating if you live with your parents I think it's called living with your parents when you cohabitate I
00:03:53| believe the definition is you you live with someone who you are romantically or sexually active with so you don't cohabitate with your roommates from college I think there's no sexual
00:04:07| there's your origin which is a couple's version and then the state or fact of living or existing at the same time or in the same place I think we're really discussing my definition today what I
00:04:19| think I don't know I think we you touch it's different than having a roommate I don't think I mean it is different if you want to get into your intimate sexual relationships mm-hmm you do with
00:04:33| my room with my roommates really yeah has it's really so I consider it to be like thinking of all the time that I've spent living alone in my entire life it was this tiny span between graduating
00:04:51| college and moving down here which was only about nine months like really truly honestly living alone did you live with your buddy before and almost certainly did the stats on that do not favor
00:05:05| people who live cohabitate but also one thing you have to watch there's a caveat caveat these websites are all biased based on religious aspect yeah there's so many of them look a factual but there
00:05:17| you can tell why the words you can just tell I can tell by the title and where it's coming from yeah this remind me when we did the porn episode and it'll be like his porn
00:05:26| healthy and then like all the websites were like beat the Beast ironically enough sounds like they want you to do it defeat the monster slay the uh you know
00:05:38| they have all these words I guess 15 or something yeah something like it how would you do that that's incredible or weird wait wait many of us 15 oh god please do not fat fine sapa thighs or
00:05:52| when any man has an unusual bodily discharge such a discharges unclean anyone who touches his bed must wash their clothes and bathe in water and they will be unclean until evening so
00:06:04| you just got uncleanliness for a night don't don't do it don't do it won't do it morning yeah exactly a long day yeah usually I just use like a towel or something like it
00:06:15| you know yeah I make sure it doesn't touch me and then I'm I'm clean you're clean I'm good nice feed on you bro hmm well which is one thing you can't do when you cohabitate
00:06:26| if someone's always around you imagine if you lived in a an apartment that only had one room a studio apartment studio I don't know why they make it sound grand so see it has to sound like something
00:06:36| yeah that's a real estate real estate folks yeah mm-hmm so if you understand your garbage and that person always lived with you like if they were sitting in the background like you had the same
00:06:47| work hours essentially yeah you hung out with the same people how cuz your friends or whatever how would you do you would not do well I didn't do well so Tommy the flowers my old roommate I was
00:07:03| roommates with him for four years we're the only ones that shared a room by the time we lived in the house but we had like some of the same classes we always went to the same parties same
00:07:12| schedules essentially except he had crew early in the morning hmm I like 5:45 in the morning we just said what you shouldn't do in the morning guess what that's what I would do it and
00:07:26| then you're gonna crow All Right see ya all right dude oh this is that like II like click that lock do you like right back then right back to nm right back to sleep until classes you know
00:07:38| yeah beautiful glorious that is actually whenever someone would leave the house when I was a teenager whenever everyone would leave the house gods of lowered I mean once you have the house to yourself
00:08:00| you're pretty much like this is my domain and then you prove it by not being bored anymore I don't know if that's proving it but it's that it's definitely something to do expression it
00:08:11| is physical expression yeah so this is like living alone talk the opposite of cohabitation like there are pros and cons to both I guess alright I think that's I will say how
00:08:27| often have you lived alone if you ever don't know if I ever have maybe I haven't hold on roommates roommates housemates girlfriend no I think I've never lived alone it's not right hey I
00:08:45| think you just said something earlier that's weird so how long did you do it for nine months and I thought I was losing my mind at the end because I kind of fell into a routine and then
00:08:54| everything kind of like meshes together and you just start to lose your mind honestly I think I don't think I don't think I'm made for it even though I'm very introverted I don't write I don't
00:09:05| do well that's Azir I lose focus like yeah there's no social aspect in your house yeah like that's weird cuz my house is one giant social aspect yeah I paint in my a social expect a fun one a
00:09:22| laugh and I doing stuff and once you have kids it's kind of out you know what I mean yeah which is why I consider cohabitation more than just a spouse okay because your kid I can see where
00:09:32| you'd run that so we're talking about being alone versus being whatever see I did more of my research on just people who live together boyfriend girlfriend style manage then arch touch they yeah
00:09:42| well we will cuz that's where I did a lot of my research um I think just last year was the first year that they cohabitating been married huh it's the first time it's happened in I mean since
00:09:58| census since I censuses sense these have been done see cuz up did a bunch of vehicles that's good yeah but it's the first time I think it's around 30% or something like that and married is down
00:10:14| there like 28% or something like that so the cohabitation before marriage is is happening a lot more because yeah people there's no stigma even the religious right and there's also yeah the UM so
00:10:26| for reference 1968 which was roughly fifty years ago eighteen to twenty four group do you know what percentage of them cohabitated in a house together like couples that
00:10:40| weren't married 0.1% wow that's almost nobody that's those of the people that are ostracized it literally doubled in the 25 to 34 group back then though point two percent
00:10:54| Wow people were afraid to report it exactly some of its reporting but some of it I mean think about it you didn't buy a house unless you were like newlyweds or like party married or
00:11:06| something and a lot of diverse cultures lips what he's probably like under 10% or 15% back then wasn't it in the 60s I guess yeah I guess because you ostracized based on
00:11:17| the hair and it was like let me see a religion yeah yeah religion was tied to the laws a little bit kind of - I don't know yeah even though it's not like it doesn't
00:11:26| seem like it actually no it doesn't actually do it so now it's like it's on the rise well did you see the first time ever that it was uh not I don't know if it's the technically atheists but like
00:11:40| non-religious people are now overtaking all other demographic really spirituality so there's no majority now I think it's making a change you're making a push mm-hmm all this stuff EDS
00:11:52| and flows yeah like think about it you couldn't just like we would even what I'm doing like even what I did yeah like you go what Winnick what did I do I am I moved in
00:12:09| with my friend and then I heard sister moved in and then now I live with that her and we had a kid any well anyway oh I am living in sin a complicated arrangement it's a complicated
00:12:31| arrangement which I brought upon myself or didn't or still don't I don't know that it's more complicated than a non like a married situation like yeah there's totally something to be said for
00:12:47| um a lot of the websites I came across and YouTube videos and stuff where were very um conservative ones with conservative views non liberal and they were like the reason that cohabitation
00:12:59| always leads to divorce is this oh it was like it was only like 60% of like people who cohabitated before marriage actually got divorced whereas like I guess general is 50% right and the other
00:13:14| thing is to actually divorced or separated the cohabitation thing I did didn't specify but it did specify that if you were married for seven years that it's the same as everything else it
00:13:26| didn't matter right so what we're saying because we read the articles and whoever's listening might not have there tends to be a push from the conservative side that says if you cohabitate before
00:13:37| you get married hey you might not get married B you'll not respect your wife if you're a man C you will have a kid out of wedlock you will have a kid out of wedlock and then
00:13:49| you will get divorced well I mean that kind of still happens regardless of the cohabitation so what about the try before you buy an aspect so it found that people who were sexually active
00:14:03| earlier in life tend to be happy not give a [ __ ] about but not give a [ __ ] about cohabitation like it's not a big deal because they've tried it before they buy it it like is that is that the
00:14:16| sticking point habitation versus marriage is it the sex or is it like that you don't sign legal paperwork because marriages is it about legality or religious kind of themes so
00:14:27| I guess we're gonna rewind before you have kids yeah so it's just two people living together deciding that they want to be together I assume mm-hmm I mean the marriage part favors the woman most
00:14:39| of the time so the man has more power when it's just cohabitating and I guess that's why most I guess must be my room arm maybe but there's also this to keep in mind the marriage is less apt to fall
00:14:53| apart because there's ramifications legally financially and otherwise which I mean you just touched on but I'm expanding on it yeah like there's a shared bank account now that has to be
00:15:05| separated there's legal paperwork you have to file to be divorced to legally be separated it's more than just a cohabitation we hate each other we're gonna leave and then you leave and you
00:15:16| kind of argue over who gets what and it all gets thrown out the window anyway so I take it from a different aspect is it and I don't I can't imagine marrying somebody without having lived with them
00:15:25| because when you live with them you see the weirdness that they believe so lets through them yeah let's let's look at the true annoyances that we have of the other person so my friend Ryan who's a
00:15:39| big fan of the podcast he dated a girl that he met for nine months and then popped a question Wow he knew some his lightening feelings sure that's that's totally fine but my
00:15:53| argument to myself I don't think I ever told him was always you don't even know what she's like in November December and January you don't speak Italian oh yeah I mean you don't know something for a
00:16:07| full year that's weird no even the first three or four months when you meet somebody there's that puppy love that just engulfs you and that could be the shitty months that they live in their
00:16:17| cycle of liddie could be we also did the episode of limerence and love you can click it here we're here I was so you 16 I think how did you know that's incredible and
00:16:28| and anyway you can just look it up because we're not gonna have the link hmm anyway um yeah that the limerence thing and puppy love it's a it's a real thing beyond conservative argument
00:16:40| against cohabitation touched on that they said well when you cohabitate you're in puppy love and you don't really know what responsibility is so now I kept wanting to tell the video
00:16:50| also is so this has crashed four months of marriage what's dense yeah you think you're in some sort of like fantastic place that you're supposed to be in I don't know that I don't know that you
00:17:03| should follow societal norms because they don't really lead anywhere they might merely lead to a societal normal outcome usually which yeah which is neutral really yeah so it was a really
00:17:17| low guide I know you want to touch on what Sumerian things people do yeah there you go good I know it go off the toothpaste roll like the toothpaste the tube she scrunches it with her fists and
00:17:30| doesn't like yeah supposed to go from the back end forward and then like the top of it it doesn't cross field Palestine mmm-hmm how do you do that how do you do that makes you so mad I can
00:17:44| actually tell I I don't know I mean we keep separate roles but we only have to share it's like what is this is this my life now center for ants yeah do you um do you guys use the same toothpaste like
00:17:58| is there an agreement or is it different every time or typically different until she runs out and then I'm the Boy Scout so I'm always prepared so I have like an extra roll mmm so like I like share it
00:18:08| for a little while until you get annoyed and then I pull it XII folks everyone listen and Dan here is he's just so he said the door he's so good reach you right aim take this toothpaste roll and
00:18:23| shove it if it's toothpaste rule goddamn right I bought it I was proud yeah goddamn right you should prep next time we'll teach you interpret and ever you look at drill sergeant I can see you
00:18:36| showing up where's your to face take this take it now goddammit goddammit anyway mine's uh it's a lot of little things like the it all adds up okay it does it's like it's
00:18:51| like why would you let thee so there's that little carpet that sits in the middle of the bathroom oh yeah it gets kicked further and further towards the shower and when it's up against the
00:19:02| shower any water running down makes it soaking wet so I always pull it and put it towards the middle and for whatever reason one of them is always just do they kick it towards the shower I can't
00:19:11| even understand why it gets there and it's always wet and I'm always like well you don't want to touch on the tile when you step out the shower right it's this far why does it have to be put it
00:19:22| against the goddamn anyway the other one is the one Ange is done with her salad at the end of the day like she brings a saladin and then container of dressing she throws him in the sink and they
00:19:34| would sit there forever and I'm like a container like someone's plastic container a Tupperware Tupperware hey a Tupperware with a smaller cup already oh yeah the smelliest thing is salad
00:19:44| dressing and almost done salad that's been singing a container all day and every time I do it I just get a whiff of salad dressing I'm like and the other one you know what she does she is a very
00:19:57| clean individual and she will put her dishes in the sink when she's done except that she always puts her paper towel like her napkin paper towel like that she was eating dinner with in the
00:20:08| sink with it so that if an hour goes by I go back and like blues of wet paper towel and like what you've walked past the trashcan trashcan why did you bring it to the sink now I got a wet paper
00:20:19| towel a bleb paper towels like the grossest thing so let's jump let's jump out of context here because in college I lived with five or six guys at the same time in the sink is something Dory your
00:20:33| bio six guys at the same time all together all at once just you wait so I was - wait is what that was the other name mother you're good so I guess at that time we were
00:20:48| seniors and anyone I think it's at 2100 def want to tell my other 2020 dovish and I can't remember so I think we had already realized that it like doing dishes like
00:21:00| who's like out of the question so like whatever you know it's never gonna open barely if they're gonna work out yo someone's always gonna make a mess and you're gonna be like what's your problem
00:21:09| so like yeah you would never make meals because meals required that like you share the duty of doing something so like one person cooks and the other person cleans well if you have five
00:21:20| people there's always like three or four freeloaders you do your self wants reloading and that person isn't so there was never like like quote-unquote family meals in college like it's very very
00:21:33| rare that someone would like cook a meal and be like everyone eat it once and yeah everyone clean up and it's all said and done no that doesn't happen no so I guess that brings I like the
00:21:45| whole point no no that's like a dishes it's like dishes and shared stuff like washing and cleaning it's like all that stuff is kind of like contentious so that you're only battling but the door
00:21:57| is taking the police and Counting how much work you're doing yeah hundred percent cuz I do more dishes than anyone at this point it's slowly becoming more and more and
00:22:10| every time I do that I'm like keep in mind like I'm just keeping track and then someone when you're almost done will pop in and say do you need any help no no just did mall good we're good
00:22:22| I'm keeping track I always love the like I cooked a meal like two days ago and I'm like you get down the bottom of the sink and it's like what what is this still doing here this should have been
00:22:31| done a day ago you're just like what hunts from two days ago : Oh I guess I'll just I guess I'll just do it now bitter so cohabitation equals bitterness keeping score mm-hmm well
00:22:51| here's the question so I'll ask you since you have lived too long I can't figure out the delineation of work and how to do it if you lived alone following all the tests that I had to do
00:23:02| when I live to live how did I do them essentially or like how much work was it actually it's weird yeah as you is it a lot I've no idea laundry trash I'm where did my systems
00:23:13| because like I'll do it in such a way that I will do the least amount of work possible like when I I'll do this like when I do my laundry like I'll have two drawers
00:23:22| open like underwear and socks and like those things are easy to toss so like as I'm doing my laundry I'm just like throwing like stuff that's not socks or underwear
00:23:31| aside and then every soccer underwear I like throw it in the drawers throwing it it's like a five-minute process of like doing my laundry and then like I take the pile and I I do that it takes me no
00:23:42| time at all I feel like when I do it by myself like I'm already preparing for my future self to do it so I make it such that it's easy to yea make sense but like your trashcan will get filled
00:23:54| eventually or like do you do dishes from what you just made at night and then like you clean it like immediately cuz I knew I had to go oh that makes sense because it's no there's no hope there
00:24:06| that someone else is gonna take care of it yeah yeah there's no no one is gonna yeah let's do whatever needs to be done like you much if somebody showed up knock knock I'm sorry walking through
00:24:16| fishes and you're like okay let's see what imagine if it was like a really hot sexy woman that just like was like I want to do your dishes like you'd be like what and then my dishes afterwards
00:24:28| you're just like does how does this end like hmm you want to take care of my dog my dog needs to be walked yeah how much do you charge for dog walking should rub and tugs be legal folks that was the
00:24:52| owner of the Patriots is that where you're going no no I just I was because he was calling supper and I robbed begin at rhodium yes he was the guy with millions of dollars gets caught in like
00:25:03| a like a strip mall Roberto Diaz - I guess I don't know I mean I would have a private rub-and-tug er but isn't it but worrying after a while it's the same person doing the same move
00:25:16| okay you're gonna be surprised good the backroom song will come in like wow the wind someone who's not good at this yeah I mean I want to feel like a
00:25:31| teenager again it's like hey there's the whole argument like you know if they're really good at their job you're done in like a minute you don't I mean but if someone's not
00:25:40| good at their job you get your money's worth it's like I want someone who's okay time though oh god oh face yeah that's the funniest scene in the movie because I still don't know what's going
00:25:58| on in this little interaction between his yeah I do the ways you say I get the partying blow me like that that's so good oh so what I will say Rick with the cohabitation though the positives are
00:26:20| like I look at going back to college and living with a bunch of guys is that there's always I'm gonna hang out with there's always something to do if you want to go get a meal there's somebody
00:26:31| don't have to do a lot of work either true I know I mean you do but you know one does it so it's kind of cool it's like you're not doing dishes a lot but that's because no one's doing dishes a
00:26:42| lot and there's no like the middle ground is like like maybe someone does that maybe someone doesn't but if there's like a hard ground we're like he had a huge party and like the apartment
00:26:51| is trashed everyone helps out like they all get it see that that that everyone's going to work on yeah so it's there's there's positives there that like you know
00:27:02| everyone has a limit and they all know when to chip in mm-hmm I miss Lisa you end up bonding with those people so much so deeply you miss also because of the time of your life and where you are in
00:27:16| your life and possibilities uh yeah sure shatter what was that word Hey Oh with something I touched on if we wanted to switch it and talk about college days forever oh yes which it I
00:27:33| know I know all right so with cohabitation that people people were sexually active earlier tend to be like who gives a [ __ ] yeah live together like it go ahead
00:27:44| because people there's a some religious conservative type idea that you should save sex and living with someone for marriage mm-hmm but you had said it earlier like if you don't know a person
00:27:57| that way then you don't know them right that's true I read the staff that only like twenty seven percent of people will actually disapprove of cohabitating before
00:28:06| marriage she's been there do you know what Mays group I'm gets over fifty it's probably older people yeah yeah yeah I saw a stat it was like 18 and 25 26 to was like the most disapproving there's
00:28:24| no there's a computer yeah they just said elders didn't even have an age group do you think the elders just always disapprove I feel like maybe that's the role in society they're going
00:28:34| to but think of this like if we hear that like 16 year olds around sex with like 38 year olds in like 15 20 years or what's not 18 8 like 16 years having sex with 38 year olds so like sugar daddies
00:28:49| no like sixteen year olds are having sex with 38 year olds it's cute murder your keywords keywords but I mean if we heard that and people are like so sorry are you saying just let it go at this point
00:29:07| don't that at that point I feel like the woman is being taken advantage of because I don't think that's so but so is an 18 year old that make sex with a thirty million year old do you don't
00:29:17| even what's the difference and we're not gonna do a wipe is against a sexist view yeah cuz I assume that it's a guy going after a younger girl but it would be another guy after an older woman and
00:29:27| again this is like 30 years which maybe it'll be almost passe and I'll be like this mm-hmm I'll make this face too this does kind of go into like the
00:29:39| your scandals of like the older teachers having sex with the younger guys that's a phenomenon I don't know what that is well they're they're I think they're being tried but not severely like
00:29:49| they're just like socially it's almost excited to get the sex crime well socially they're getting high fives or whatever or like it's like not legally I think they're getting pretty big trouble
00:30:00| we should do an episode on reassure someone I follow always posts the best stories they can and then the picture of the teacher and it's like usually a white woman in there like 30s it was
00:30:12| like not bad-looking yeah it's really weird it's like it doesn't make sense why she couldn't just go after someone her own age I don't know it's there might like a little bit
00:30:22| eager student relationship or something he's like I don't know she's teaching them and they're learning from her because her husband never listens to her and doesn't learn from her so she's
00:30:30| actually able to touch someone even if it's technically intellectual now she's like it's weird because I never look at a picture of a guy who had committed the same crime and say oh he's am i
00:30:43| attractive and like I understand finds elsewhere cohabitation hmm cohabit mm-hmm I think we covered all the citiots actually you and do learning every kind of time so the size of a
00:31:07| household what's that so back in 1960s the size of a house was like 3.3 people perhaps up now it's only like 2.5 so like people having less kids yeah that's part of a special s that are
00:31:22| actually between people not like only children do you think only children because they're alone they're more likely to be alone I didn't look up stack the only children I don't know no
00:31:35| because I feel like they get married now they're probably less likely as in bids are more to get married that dirty word we haven't even gotten into marriage really I like a smaller
00:31:48| household I don't know I think that we have no she didn't like a how larger household is more loving and more friendly and full house little style there's you I mean you were just talking
00:31:58| about having living with six guys right yeah and there's a lot of love there but it's because there's more people there's more instances there's more interaction and when you only have three people in a
00:32:11| house there's less interaction by proxy maybe uh uh maybe there's fewer dynamics I mean member X&Y hate each other I mean they they don't really hate each other and Z is always prodding a fight between
00:32:26| them but Z is really like BFF with F sometimes and then sometimes a it's always like the funny guy he's like hilarious but he hates X so it's really funny when x and y are fighting with a
00:32:38| and it's like uh and Z's gonna push them and then somebody's like oh my god he brought booze and it's like you hold these different mixtures going on and like pushes and pulls and relationships
00:32:48| so the more people the more of that going on more dynamics if I were to say yes fewer people fewer dynamics fewer interesting interactions right yeah what's happening unless you can you
00:33:02| can't pick and choose as much you're forced to so if it's only two people you're forced to deal with whatever they think especially if you're in a relationship or you're married is you're
00:33:11| forced to deal with whatever [ __ ] they shovel your way even if the [ __ ] becomes a big pile of crap that have to pull twice your way yeah right there's no other people that delineate it or break
00:33:23| it up and don't judge it yeah it's shoving them one day the other day one guy the other day and like break it off you're kind of it's a very heavy load do you feel like you have a media tour
00:33:31| though do you think we're like third party your third party jumps in and says this isn't how would you be sometimes but only it changes anything hmm interesting because no for a very easy
00:33:47| reason when it's three guys living together as roommates you all have equal say yeah equal power weights when it's two people in a very serious relationship with a kid
00:33:56| and then just a third party they're almost treated as a third party sometimes like when things get serious yes what's what stay do you have missed yeah exactly exactly I'm fourth wheel
00:34:09| that makes what we call a vehicle regularise oh [ __ ] where's earlier I had somewhere to go and it was good I forget what it was shoveling [ __ ] is that we were thinking up oh [ __ ] me yeah
00:34:30| so do you think what's the different swing cohabitation in marriage ultimately is it just a piece of paper or is there something else to it so ah this is where I was gonna go
00:34:43| economically there so like there was a period where like financially people relied on each other so like and there's an instance like maybe you are relying on someone for financial backing in
00:34:54| order to live where you live yeah it's like I would such in my relationship its flipped or it was flipped in the beginning at least then to live where we live it required me to make more money
00:35:05| than what money yeah right so in a lot of cases I think women or upselling there's that stat for like female doctors like female doctors will not like they won't marry a male nurses many
00:35:19| a time they will marry a male doctor yeah though or higher they'll go for somebody that has a higher income than they do but very rarely they'll go down but a male doctor will go down pretty
00:35:31| readily he'll go down he'll come to town like July he's going on some hot dogs he's bobbing down some dogs baby yeah so like that economically I feel like back then it was required like the 1960s you
00:35:48| always have all that the tropes about how like a man was the person making yeah right winner and it was very difficult for a woman to like seek her own income and become independent like
00:36:00| you didn't have I feel like 1970s 80s that kind of started that and then now it's kind of like a little repetition now it's like it's getting pretty close yeah like it's not a surprise to find a
00:36:11| woman that makes more than a man yeah [ __ ] who lives with her and more that ain't fighting with her every night or that ghoul on like Google got cited for like being sexist and then when they
00:36:23| actually looked the data it turned out that they were underpaying men and the same roles as women and they're like oh weird interesting yeah I guess it's a general consensus of view of viewpoint
00:36:36| more an image than it is a fact yeah there's no I don't know that there's any way to prove how much people should make so no of course not so not just economic roles but um like cleaning roles and we
00:36:52| touched on this but they said the difference between cohabitation and marriage is that when you cohabitate this is the argument by like what's his name he's a nerd ben shapiro
00:37:02| you know is oh yeah he's very good at debate life foot by foot for though I don't know Ben Shapiro's height offhand I feel like he is and I feel like I feel like he's never as I've said in me wrong
00:37:15| he talks really fast people who talk too fast I don't trust them no I don't trust me anyway um I think his argument against cohabitation and marriage was that um crap I should
00:37:28| start about economic Oh like when you cohabitate you're having a good time you're laughing you're having drinks you're going out and partying when you get married all of that has to change
00:37:38| and there are roles that are assumed and that people aren't ready for those roles and it it's rocks them and it's the problem with cohabitating first is that you're
00:37:48| you have this expectation of fun and good times and everything but marriage is hard so just seem like you're sleeping over the unless you got you have a big point
00:38:00| to make no it wasn't a big point guys what am I skip you're skipping over the point where you're supposed to be like at the alpha you're supposed to go out and like hope and track down your women
00:38:10| and like yeah make the money you're supposed to do things that are like power actually got hurt by hitting her over a head with a wooden cool like really I hit her over the head
00:38:19| grabbed her hair and just dragged or dad joke I've ever heard one the crap little caveman jokes yeah so there's there's a period of your life where you're supposed to be like free-ranging lone
00:38:31| wolf whatever like you're supposed to like discover your own make your own would you ever do that no not really yeah I don't the way you broke up I was like I'm waiting for you to kind of say
00:38:41| I did it now I could see I could see a lot of my friends like think that do it but then there was no like comeuppance there's no there's no like glory moment where they're like I did it like I don't
00:38:55| think the glory is actually there I think the glory is in the long run finding someone that's like compatible just letting it anywhere listen there's no glory there's no galore it's all dead
00:39:04| so if you had made if you're making like double what you're making now or triple sure what do you think did would that change would you be like I'm gonna buy a house I'm gonna make sure you live in it
00:39:15| and then like it would you have the power yeah but then no people I would have the power but then the arguments would still be there that the Paper Towns will still
00:39:26| be in the sink the yeah a lot of the same stuff would show up yeah it wouldn't change it changes the dynamics in that where you're doing the argument whoa what house you're doing it in how
00:39:41| much money you're arguing over but it's like still it's okay no a lot basically the same regardless of their environment that's what you're trying to sin regardless of whether they're married or
00:39:51| regardless whether they're cohabitating and regardless of how much money they actually make they tend to out spend their means they tend to do certain things to each other
00:40:02| piss each other off in a weird way if you could have somebody that takes care of all those things do you think there's less love and the relationship if do you think that's like less of a relationship
00:40:14| if you have someone taking care of all the arguments like if there's a maid that would clean you're saying can do your laundry and remove those no because then what's left
00:40:28| what do you argue over I don't know not even just argue over what colors you're painting like like there's no there's nothing going on so there's more blank spaces so this is the the housewife
00:40:43| which we do we don't have single I don't would you call it housewives I guess moms to stay home with her kids right oh right how many we do word we don't have them I assume if
00:40:58| we had a lot of money that our women B could become house makers homemakers probably and stay home and just do them the clean the house ya know did your mom stay home for a while but then she had
00:41:13| her job okay and that was Barca but yeah yeah my mom stayed home until I guess it shouldn't have to take care of us so then she became a homemaker late grade school or something yeah so it's
00:41:26| kind of a they start to make it make it a home they start to add knickknacks and crap all over the place and then like things are you there all the time yeah I guess if you have a lot of time on your
00:41:38| hands you start to make you know why did you literally said it earlier when you said you lived alone for nine months it your father she probably starts to drive them crazy
00:41:47| they're probably like mm-hmm and that's you have to get out you have to interact you have to see something different you have to get out there I don't know hmm hmm where were my points what was I
00:42:02| gonna hit on in the beginning I forget already you were really big on the viagra [Laughter] surprise that Ted Cruz is 511 they make
00:42:20| him look short in a lot of pictures wait Ted Cruz the guy who looks like the uncle from The Munsters yeah grandpa grandpa excuse me oh man mmm so here's my question I did
00:42:41| touch on it you didn't answer it what is the damn difference between being married and cohabitating I see because I'm married with money did getting married okay I wasn't against
00:42:53| marriage like some people are against it or whatever it's mine based a little bit on finances a little bit on me it's only like if lawyers get involved like I've already get divorced it would cost money
00:43:05| to have a lawyer involved and then she makes somewhere - what I make so that's alimony is probably not an issue but for some people probably is and then I guess if you have kids the child support is
00:43:18| there regardless of whether you're married or not sometimes most of the time probably right there's I just read an article on the laws about that and all that stuff so I mean other than like
00:43:29| having a ring and being like take this ring and shove it every now and then like I guess there's the I guess if you don't marry a woman that she's gonna feel like she's not gonna have children
00:43:42| so which is that like the bigger issue for some women really want children and like their time frame for having children is like 35 or younger based on a French study from like the 1800s
00:43:53| so it's true it's true no I know the study we did it one on babies and not the age and all that yeah but what about people who cohabitate and do have babies does that make their relationship more
00:44:10| fragile or less enjoyable or I don't see how it changes things at all really unless you its unless one of them wants to get married do you think she wants to get married she makes more than you
00:44:25| should be that's like sharing finances is part of getting married a little bit you have common common finances do you have come and finances yes no we do no no you write a check could say this is
00:44:37| how much I owe and then she grunts this is so bitter mm-hmm all right so like age of getting married has that shifted to oh it's going up they know food readily yeah
00:44:56| in the 1500 so good oh yeah since you live longer did you know that I think Nebraska their legal age of getting married is 19 instead of 18 which is like every other state except for
00:45:11| Mississippi which is like you have to be not anything no no actually you have to be 21 or wait I think you have to be yeah 20 or 21 Oh what's going on there I have no idea but it it's bizarre
00:45:25| now Mississippi 21 I didn't write that tap that's weird I don't know why I don't I mean good on them in a way should be you should be older Daffy to marry cohabitation should actually be a
00:45:36| law I just changed my mind right now haha proof I mean I'm just thinking about it cuz think about it when time when I was 20 or 21 no friggin know so that's like mentally I think your
00:45:48| personality fuses they're 25 26 ish somewhere in there and now in I think the study ran until 2017 so the women were getting married at twenty seven point four and men were
00:46:02| getting married at twenty nine point five so say yeah so this is perfect spawned a big response call response there's a whole there's a whole segment of this show we could have talked about
00:46:21| yeah LGBTQ they did yeah I think so I think there's another one actually that's like steamed or slicing so no that's favourite include beans include the arts and arts no no I was just gonna
00:46:37| say they have to cohabitate in a lot of states now it's changed in recent years but like that's if you were gay or lesbian or something and you wanted to be married they wouldn't let you so you
00:46:48| had to cohabitate so the insurance is another aspect of this which we didn't talk about it's like if you want a partner ship someone's gone partnership with PAA
00:46:57| yes yes that you have to prove that you're like connected in some way and if you share a small matter what's common-law marriage is at five years or something it really depends on where you
00:47:08| are it's like a year or something maybe two years in Texas yeah I thought I was like three or five years here but maybe although it's the girl every state they I think they do it down here because of
00:47:20| immigrants and if the immigrants live together long enough it's like you guys are married and that'll be like ass behind ya and I'd be like no you guys are married you're like you're like
00:47:31| married there was a there thing right there will we miss it like the insurance part of it is key to is if you have a kid and it's not your kid but you have better insurance then you have to prove
00:47:43| that it's like buy a partner it becomes difficult like these things should not be intertwined and for some reason they are they shouldn't be but then there's like our cases are pretty cut-and-dry
00:47:54| like there are people who have kids with people then move away and then start dating their sister and their cousin and then like do this and they go back and they're like well I still care for the
00:48:04| kid and it's like that's still my kid and she's like you can care for the kid that's my kid and they're like yeah I'll do it but what's his legal recourse here and they're like well he's gonna pay for
00:48:15| the insurance I'll clean them and then he does this and it's it's it's kind of a mess and I think that's what people are against they don't want a mess because the kids could get lost in the
00:48:26| cracks like with marriage there's a there's a one and there's another and they have to stay together and they they both have the kid at heart when you don't I guess people are afraid that
00:48:37| you're going to have all these other connections all these other partners all these other kids and they people get lost it's kind of the argument against it I guess there's a quote from the
00:48:49| movie adaptation all I really love is that she says this one I think this was a screenplay and what his name playing no news media plays II please both characters are River in itself but I
00:49:03| think Meryl Streep says it like people like to whittle down life to the simple pieces so that it makes more sense because it's easier to handle so like whittling the act of whittling
00:49:14| it down is like making it so you get married and you have one person and not like it's not like you have this web of people that are your love interests like that's a weird thing that's a weird
00:49:24| concept to be polyamorous like to have multiple wives or multiple houses or like mistresses change every seven years don't don't people change things change even if even if you don't society
00:49:39| changes in a way that things change so we live longer you get more related to resent each other you can grow apart you can go in different directions this is all real stuff so I don't know if I
00:49:56| want to ask this question I might not answer hey I can ask it it's like have you found that you wanted I mean I I feel like it there there are certain women that I see and I interact with
00:50:08| that I'd be like it'd be really interesting to like have dated them like if they had met me when I was younger I wish I could have met like had been like let's try this out go back in time when
00:50:18| you were that you'd the age you met them at and they were that age because they might be different now but good yeah I feel like there's a period where you realize like 95% of the person that
00:50:29| you're with and you know their limitations and there's a randomness to like you know they're going he you know they're this you know what they're gonna say when you bring up this and this is
00:50:40| the counter-argument I think already is that the other person is really lowering and interesting and different until you really get down to it and I feel like it's exactly these two cohabitated with
00:50:50| them you'd be in the exact same situation yeah they would still eventually get banished yeah yeah yeah they would they would do the the toothpaste or wrong way yeah which way
00:51:00| is the toilet paper supposed to go it depends if you have kids that are cats that hit it you reverse it if they have kids so they don't unroll the whole thing under over we shouldn't say to me
00:51:16| roll it out towards the back think you know a guy yeah sorry no guys sorry Nick what about not replacing the toilet paper at all and just leaving an empty
00:51:30| roll and then picking it up and rolling it over though you're gonna hate me for this and maybe they would have this complain about me no no no no if I use toilet paper I take the roll off the
00:51:42| stupid-ass spindle wrapped around my hand I use it wrap around my hand use it and then sometimes I forget to put it back on the spindle because I I'm not spindling know that you're not a
00:51:51| Spindler no I have to grab it with my hand just do this a guy who doesn't wash his towels this is not Spindler that's correct if you I live together I'm probably be pissed off at each other
00:52:05| about this is what it comes down to really this is really weird I'm Debbie we would hate each other but I don't know what for well I think I I figured there'd be a smell like I remember you
00:52:15| like using your shower at your your parents place and like there's a little mold on the on the like that not the sheet like the plastic curtain and I was like I see you [ __ ] live like this
00:52:28| and like I would leave it till it gets just covered in mold I care less that's it boy I like touching that slimy surface it's just like but anyway that is a my girlfriend sister she cleans he
00:52:44| changes it all the time like it that's what work boils down to in these households these cohabitation cease marriage is anything it's the lowest common denominator there's
00:52:55| someone who will break and fix it I'm gonna McLean Rick and did or do whatever right yeah oh yeah and sometimes you know when you're being tested it's like I'm gonna leave this for that person so
00:53:09| that they do it or not and we're gonna let's find out they don't of interest Tommy the flowers he and I were than the best two people at pushing an envelope as far
00:53:25| as humanly possible hmm we would have garbage sit in the room both of us thought the others haha and leave it for months I can leave a piece of trash with ketchup in it and
00:53:37| a paper towel for over six weeks and he could leave it like we would have these contests that who were aware of the weren't aware of and we would just push it to some weird limit that I didn't
00:53:52| think was humanly possible he was really good at it I was I became really good at it because he was good at it his alarm would go off for 45 minutes straight one day and I just refused to
00:54:05| tell him his alarm was going off so I tried to ignore it like cohabitation teaches you a lot about a person and to this day I don't think I hate anyone as much as I hate him I love them
00:54:18| well your mental resilience went up yo he went up through the roof so you're gonna touch on kids sure so I'm not going to touch any kids touch on them like that yeah just know about them so I
00:54:38| have to and it's I don't it's difficult because you wake up I realized today I wake up I take care of them I go to work I get back I might have half an hour Picon for daycare and then take care of
00:54:55| them again until I do this podcast so I'd like the entire day is mostly dealing with shitty diapers and then dealing with the Supremes and cleaning up the things that people won't clean up
00:55:09| themselves yeah it's really picking up stuff the other people were playing with exactly so there was like a resilience there that I don't know you realize is there I thought it I thought about this
00:55:21| today is that when if I were to go back in time and to be a kid again I would be like um like I have all this free time I could just go out and like play in the forest or do some weird [ __ ] like
00:55:32| whatever the hell I wanted to do it's like as you get older you don't have any of that and people are all like they start piling up on top of you and they start relying on you and then you become
00:55:43| like the like breadwinner but like the head of the household so like you're relied upon which makes it so you can't do very much at all I put it this way um you become
00:55:55| as you grow you become like a tree I mean you have roots you can't you couldn't pick up and leave tomorrow could you give so many financial connections so many work things so many
00:56:06| people so many things that rely on you to leave children so many connections sociological just regular stuff like if you left for a week and your lawn over grill you'd have to have a cut because
00:56:19| ordinances say you will be fine then you're like who goes there and it's like homeowners associations these these connections responsibilities people around you jobs
00:56:32| social events even things you've committed two weeks ago like going to a party or bringing dip like it sounds stupid but they're all roots and you have so many routes that take up so much
00:56:43| of your time that you can't just go wandering off to some Island say yet don't wanna know so that leads into like restarting like if you were to restart like actually
00:56:56| forming the bonds that you have now because you've stayed in the same place family a time when a new family in a new place yeah yeah I don't think you would find that I don't know I read an article
00:57:07| about hood older people merrily and like trying to find out what they wanted to do see that's it that's too far at that age I think you're done you're over you've passed it no no no I don't think
00:57:20| I have you know why mm-hmm that's lost more weight I look good I work out if I could come into some money in a steady job I actually could probably do the whole thing again like
00:57:35| and start over I mean I don't know what happens to my past and I don't think I would do it but physically I could so there was this person I knew one of my mom's friends husbands that his kids
00:57:50| were grown and out of college and like they guess they were like 25 or again he restarted he just disappeared one day he'll was he he must have been like 55 97 and he see that
00:58:02| takes guts Dysart yet kids again I don't know what they he just kind of he restarted his life like it's weird I mean it's possible for a guy to do that all over again but leaving all that
00:58:13| behind is just bizarre get this one my um my friend who I'd mentioned earlier in the podcast his white father had two or three families and he would go away on business a ke
00:58:32| live with the other family who had their own house zone wife their own kids and and tell them after three or four days he was going away on business fifty-fifty that's insane yeah I'll burn
00:58:51| out on one family can you imagine doing that you would have so much for somebody require you double the requirements of like the family time you have to love family time which is so bizarre because
00:59:00| you have two families you just destroyed family time for both families you've destroyed both families in a way but wait I think he did it really 10 15 years before he got caught that since
00:59:12| that I can't believe that you would say yeah that leads into like Italian mistresses like I think after a World War two there weren't that many Italian guys so
00:59:22| like a mistress was like commonplace so like having like a secondary wife wasn't like a normal thing and like families were so intertwined that like Italian men will also like live with their
00:59:35| parents for a long long time that's the thing what are they called mama's boys in Italian I thought they were chocolate I don't know I wonder what the term actually is now
00:59:45| Oh mommy is Mario Luigi he imagined it how embarrassing of the if Mario or Luigi had a cloth toilet didn't know what to do I can't make the noise don't like their
01:00:07| help go down the pipe [ __ ] dude in that game is weird when you think about what the pipes and everything was a plumber well but do you think it was the pipes first and they were like let's make him
01:00:27| a plumber and they were like that'll solve every question or you think was a plumber first and they were originally teleporters or like let's just make them pipes cuz he's a plumber that's like a
01:00:38| chain or the other way around yeah that's I think they were pipes first because they were easier to design and then afterwards are like why are all these pipes here it's crazy like a
01:00:48| Japanese guy thinks of like a plumber like it doesn't seem right well why I'm telling you the pipes had to be first all the other stuff and they were just like let's make him a plumber because
01:00:59| they figured it would just solve all their problems or questions or weird things anyways I don't momma's boys' called no it's just this mama's boy well the same thing happens in like the
01:01:09| Chinese family like Chinese families if they want to marry off like a daughter like the daughter requires them to like buy a house why they the elders calories they'll get dowry it sort of is like a
01:01:20| dowry oh yeah that's a dowry ransom baby we got you cold [ __ ] Rebs up I see you I don't know how I would deal with that cuz it I mean that does force you to set
01:01:33| up like a physical location and then if they want to move into your house like whole family cuz if most Asian families do like live together like you have a grandmom like I can't imagine having
01:01:45| like parents or grandparents in the same house like it might be nice for having like caretakers for your kids but other than that how would you feel if like a father-in-law mother my mom is getting
01:02:01| on my nerves yeah he wouldn't be able to keep it up step to me she better replace that toilet paper roll if one of them is definitely not emptying the toothpaste
01:02:12| properly I can guarantee I don't do it I don't think I want to deal with that so coming full circle huh what do we learned today about married people they hate each other just as much
01:02:31| as the people who are married like keep looking because you're never gonna find it this is a weird question our people meant to live together I would think so like I would say yeah
01:02:46| yeah well history dictates that like you live in villages they protect you like living in a and a like apartment complex or a neighborhood but you could actually live in individual huts next to each
01:02:58| other in a village are people supposed to live in one hut if like share things I feel like there's moments where you like are sick like oh he's just staying at his Hut today like
01:03:12| sometimes you need that person to be like oh he needs something like you need so so this is part that we didn't touch on it's like we touched on insurance but like if you're saying oh we can take
01:03:23| care of you or if you just need something or like say you break a leg or something like there's someone there to notice that you're injured which also feeds into like when you get older like
01:03:38| living alone when you get older it's dangerous yeah because you could fall and break a hip and then you can't hit your first alert bracelet which is good at reversal or calm on panders our
01:03:55| sponsor slash on panners keyword a lot of the old people listening I'm gonna dice slow soon that's the key word what they were saying I was like that's not a good idea time if you got dark
01:04:12| it did get dark you know I will say this I was at work and it was late and it's late the day and I was tired I wasn't thinking and somebody was doing something like I had this like setup
01:04:26| that could hurt somebody and somebody was like fake playing with it and I said like like in my mind I was like you get hurt doing that but like it's okay because you know the risks like this is
01:04:40| the full thought but what I did say was I can't wait for you to die I don't know cuz I was laughing so hard on the inside that I was like blocking everyone else out but I was like [ __ ] like I I wasn't
01:05:01| you're not supposed to say that at work but I said that like verbatim I was like so it was kind of like that joke can't wait for you to die but I'm panderers Calm First Alert calm check it out but
01:05:16| honestly if you have someone else living with you there's security there there's Chris a sanity and there's a protection and protection if you if I was so flip it a little bit if I was a single parent
01:05:27| I would probably worried that like my kids wit might not be taken care of if I was completely alone I think that I would fear that actually like if I was incapacitated in some way my kids
01:05:37| wouldn't know what the hell to do like run to a neighbor like if I didn't have neighbors weird I actually have a weird it's not a fantasy it's like a thought practice where what if everyone
01:05:49| aged 30 and older like froze one day and couldn't move but they were okay I think how many other people would die like what all the five year olds died with all the one year olds died and like I'm
01:06:01| like it I get all nervous and I'm like oh my god what it's like okay so what if your kid was like he wasn't a script or toulon two-year-old and like now you're all frozen and you can't move would they
01:06:14| all go towards the steps which ones would die with my kid die like this like that's what I think of when I'm bored thinking I don't know yeah I don't what if everyone froze except for the babies
01:06:24| or something this is like I'm just like it just depends if the pantry is open for one other kid no that's that's what I'm saying like it really would like what would it
01:06:33| what would like a three or a five-year-old do if everyone disappeared for ten hours like what they die where they wander around the streets I have no idea you just know be fun it would be
01:06:51| funny to be like okay now you just leave your kids alone for ten hours and we'll pay you we'll pay you to see with the outcome iced it sounds like the microwave
01:06:59| microwave your baby for two seconds from $10,000 no no that baby come on baby baby it's my art because they're yes a called they're uh they're two and a half year old who can wall and behind us okay
01:07:19| baby okay baby baby baby I got real annoying after like 10 minutes or like oh you good come on baby come on baby make a platform and corner baby you know like just call her name I still know her
01:07:30| name it hasn't been your probably five hours maybe the baby's name was baby I'm feeling it had a name holy [ __ ] are they that many people named baby that's gotta be weird when you're like 83 yeah baby
01:07:45| baby it's like you couldn't find the amount of people over age 60 names baby hey well let's sum up today you know I don't know what we covered but it was fantastic wasn't it hmm all those things
01:08:15| about cohabitating and living alone and independence and privacy and how you form your own personality by the way all the web side against cohabitation yeah they were like it's gonna lead to sin
01:08:28| it's gonna lead to Jesus Makana it's gonna lead to where it wasn't one of them infidelity oh you know the things maybe I don't know today's society today
01:08:44| society go all and all that stuff and copy them that's long today society and everyone else that it does with cohabitation risk marriage I guess marriage makes it harder because
01:08:56| marriage because they're supposed to move forward I guess cuz marriage is more planned marriage takes longer marriage has more paperwork so chances are it's harder to
01:09:08| break not I'm not much harder but like you planned it you wrote it down you had dates for it cohabitation is more like we're doing the same thing without that stuff so it's more planned it's more
01:09:22| formulaic it's more structured so it makes sense that it would be better in some ways but whittle down life to its simplest but really when you whittle down life to its simplest it's the same
01:09:35| as cohabitation yeah I don't know that you feel any different because you have a ring or a piece of paper you do I don't think I've done both well I am the master of my domain mm-hmm even though
01:09:54| I'm never alone anymore except right now which I share with you cohabitating at the moment is this I guess we are if you wanted if you want to jack off okay I mean listen you wanna guess you won't
01:10:08| wear our previous guests enjoy that phase look like I don't I think we're good I think we touched on everything touch the kids did we judge the kids yeah we touched on kids we touch kids
01:10:30| you key word FBI cohabitation holy [ __ ] we touched on marriage we touched on people we touched on individuals touched on religion we touched on sanctity and this excited on
01:10:43| one is sip ye we talked about how those dryer sheets shoes moving your on trash to a toilet paper yeah this stuff that other people don't take care of and you're like what the hell why is this
01:10:59| happening every time you realize there's something you don't even know about that she was a lot about you why would he do this and you're like I do what like you don't even know that's the craziest part
01:11:11| so really people are meant to hate each other they're not meant to love each other and that's why we love you make a culture together hmm passing like an end in a petri dish or
01:11:28| in a paper towel or a towel anyway a back to folks car forward 97 hurtin escort Ford Escort a red one Brad used to drive folks thanks for joining us Sonia we think you learned a lot we
01:11:52| think we learned a lot we think the shades on sale or Tamra changed it went warm and went dark it went warm it went dark for a couple times did it really yeah yes had bit more do
01:12:03| you got me beat yeah don't I look more lean but here's this bigger my Fleener I can't tell you maybe bigger damn get pick up two kids at a time yeah this is the phase where I get jacked where I put
01:12:26| up a little barrier so they can't get in certain rooms but I have to lift my kids to people like oh let's go habitate [Laughter] thanks for tuning in folks we like you
01:12:44| we like you a lot check our socials donate to our patreon it's so far we're be getting a thousand dollars a week we went up that to 1,200 a week if we can hit the goal we're gonna start recording
01:12:53| secret episodes secret episodes are only going to be available for patreon donators patreon donators you want a secret episode I literally will show you my body here I just trimmed my test a
01:13:06| little bit happy trail a little bit we're looking for pretty good folks I don't know we like you we like a lot thanks for tuning in good night folks good night
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